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<   No. 1533   2007-04-08   >

Comic #1533

1 {scene: The far end of the Bridge of Khazad-Doom, the party having crossed over it.}
1 Kyros: Stand back. I'm going to destroy the Bridge.
1 Dwalin: Nayyy! {translation: Nooo!}
2 Dwalin: 'Tis living stoone! Thu heart und soul o' Dwergenberg! 'Twould be akin tae murder tae harm it! I cannae alloow it! {translation: It's living stone! The heart and soul of Dwergenberg! It would be like murder to harm it! I can't allow it!}
3 Kyros: It's the Bridge or us! What would you rather see destroyed?!
3 Dwalin: Let me thunk on it a wee bit... {translation: Let me consider that for a minute...}
4 Alvissa: I told you dwarves were trouble...
4 Dwalin: Ye're nae makin' a convincin' argument, lassie! {translation: You're not making a convincing argument, elf-maiden!}

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See, this sort of thing makes me realise that The Fellowship of the Ring was unrealistic. How many times did you see the Fellowship break down and waste time arguing with each other in a life-and-death situation, ignoring the threat completely in favour of bickering amongst themselves on trivial matters?


What sort of lousy roleplayers were playing those characters anyway?

2017-03-01 Rerun commentary: Also, how often did you see the Fellowship members loot the bodies of their fallen victims? None! That's how many.

And where were their ten-foot poles for probing dungeon ceilings to make sure there was no green slime about to fall on them? It's like they weren't even trying.

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