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1 Lambert: It's the Balrog! It's on fire!
1 Kyros: Ah, that would explain it.
2 Kyros: Stand back! I'm going to use its own fire to cast a huge fireball!
3 Lambert: You can't fight fire with fire!
4 Kyros: Of course you can fight fire with fire. You can fight everything with fire!
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The punchline is a slight variant of the flavour text on the Magic: the Gathering card Sizzle. It was just so appropriate that I had to use it at some point.
And don't get started on those newfangled "elements". Gold is shiny but too soft to use for anything. Iron? One word: rust. Lead might slowly poison you, but that's a million times slower than good old fire.
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