1 Cthulhu: {rants at Steve in some arcane, incomprehensible, insanity-inducing tongue}
2 Cthulhu: {rants some more}
3 Cthulhu: {rants more}
4 Cthulhu: Bwah hah ha ha ha ha ha haaahhh!!

Because I know people will ask, the font is called Glyphis, and is a freeware download from various places you can find using Google.

And no, you're not supposed to understand what Cthulhu is saying. That's the whole point of the joke.

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2016-10-26 Rerun commentary: You know, if future archaeologists ever uncover things like this where writers deliberately used nonsense scripts, they're going to have a ball trying to decode it.

I fully expect to see this comic listed on Wikipedia's Undeciphered writing systems page in a few thousand years. The Phaistos Disc was probably just an old Cretan comic or something.