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1 Julius: So what qualities are important to get elected to the Senate, Marcus?
2 Marcus: Scrupulous honesty. Integrity. A desire to put the needs of Rome and its citizens ahead of yourself. Endless sacrifice and compassion.
3 Julius: Wow, I didn't realise you needed to be so dedicated, virtuous, and selfless.
4 Marcus: There's your first lesson, Julius. The ability to lie through your teeth convincingly.
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Yes, I know Romans didn't wear beards. If that's the only historical inconsistency you're worried about in this theme, then you either need to learn more about ancient Rome, or forget what you do know. :-)
The joke, by the way, is based on politicians being an Acceptable Target.
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