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1 Lambert: I still feel a bit ill. Which reminds me of my second cousin Stitchbert, the tailor. Made the finest trousers in the shire. But a prodigious drinker, he was.
2 Lambert: One night he didn't come home from the inn, and his wife called the shirriffs. She was livid; told them not to bother bringing him home if he was drunk again.
3 Lambert: They found him lying in the trash out the back of the tavern, reeking of liquor. But they took him home anyway.
4 Mordekai: Why would they return him?
4 Lambert: He was hobbit tight in the waste.
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Shirriffs are the law enforcers of hobbit towns in Tolkien's Middle-earth stories.
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